The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name.  If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story.  The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors.  I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.

This week I am pleased to share another of my own stories.

Here is  Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 27

Summer is slowly sneaking past us, and soon it will be fall.  I have seen other people do challenges, and I have a few things I need to get back on track with.  One of them is my zig-zagging on the path less travelled to living a healthier lifestyle.  I don’t have kids, and I am not going back to school.  But September can be a new start for this and other areas of my life that are lacking commitment right now.

In THM, there are many different groups to belong to.  You can join based on food types, health issues, location, budget friendly, beginner, very fluffy, the main THM group and allergy issue groups.  There is even one for people that Blog about THM. I am involved in several and have not been contributing much lately.  I can share my Blog stories on their pages, but not if that is the only thing I am contributing.  I think that is fair.

I do write this to keep myself accountable, and also to help other people.  If you don’t have the same issues I have with being morbidly obese, then reading this Blog might help you learn how to be a better friend to someone like me.  It may even help you figure out what you can do to help them.

Let’s go with a big one. Do not be the food police.  Every person that is capable of feeding themselves is also capable of deciding what to eat, what not to eat, and how much of that they are going to eat.  If I am having a piece of cake at a social gathering, and someone makes me feel bad about it, I am going to eat two or three times the amount of cake I allowed for with my meal plan and insulin doses.  Saying nothing and judging by silence or a look is no better.  I eat the guilt instead of feeling it.  That is a dangerous option for me.  I am trying so hard to make better choices, but a simple thing like me having chocolate to get through a rough work day can compound to a box of chocolates at home later on.  Yes, a box, not one or two pieces.  If I bring them home, I want to gobble them up so they aren’t there to tempt me anymore.  When I think about that, it is really messed up.  But it is how I think.

I hid being a type 2 diabetic for a long time.  Now that I am open about it, I feel like people are always watching what I eat, and judging me.  If I was realistic, I would think that I am not so important in other people’s lives that they spend time critically thinking about what I am eating.  I have answered a lot of questions regarding what I am eating for lunch at work, and when it is a healthy recipe, I am proud to share.  Even if the cauliflower that I had to heat up is stinky, or someone is grossed out by the way I am assembling my cheeseburger pie.  If it tastes good, fills me, and doesn’t make me feel bad after eating it, then I am happy to share about what I am eating, and even share the recipes I love if people want to try them.

Back to September coming up.  I am going to focus more on me, and the THM plan.  What do I mean?  It is going to be hard.  I am going to have a 30 day no cheat challenge.  Eek!  I have commitment issues when it comes to being 100% on plan, but it is about time that I really put an effort into it.  At the same time, I am going to post in the groups more in September, so that I can share the blog posts that relate to THM in the groups more.  Finally, to get myself on track and stay there, I will have to prep cook.  That also needs time and energy.  If it is focused, it does not have to take a lot of either, because I am prep cooking for me, and sometimes for my husband, not an army.  Leftovers are handy for lunches, as long as I have the means of storing them properly.

One thing that concerns me is maintaining a solid balance of my blood sugars.  I am worried about lows and treating them while staying on plan.  That is a tricky path in the brambles and may require bending of the rules a bit.  If I have to pick a quick source of the wrong kind of sugar to avoid a hospital or death, I am going to have to be OK with that.  Before I start, though, I am going to hang out in the THM Diabetes group and ask some questions to make me feel better about how to treat the lows.  I am giving myself time to do this, before the official start.  I will need to start recording my blood sugars, insulin doses and keep a food diary to make this work because if I don’t know what the patterns are, it is hard to manage the blood sugar highs and lows properly.  This sounds like work to me, but if you do something consistently for 30 days it becomes a habit, and I am trying to develop better habits for a healthier lifestyle.  I wrote it here, so now I have to follow through.

Accountability.  It is time to take things seriously again.  Writing it all down every day will help me track patterns and find out how different foods affect my sugars.  I know I am not going to be 100% on plan, being me, but if I can give it my best attempt, I will have something I can be proud of working on.  So I am going to make a real effort in September. I need to refocus on a few things, and this is one of them.  Time to start planning.  Anybody else getting ready to start fresh in September?  I will cheer you on as I share my progress every week, here.  It’s time to refocus.

#TrustYourGut