Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 83 | What Did My Brain Just Tell Me?

Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 83 | What Did My Brain Just Tell Me?

by | Jan 21, 2022 | Trust Your Gut

This is Trust Your Gut | What Did My Brain Just Tell Me? Trust Your Gut is a series of blog posts that began on February 2, 2017. In this first blog, I introduce the concept of the category and begin to share my own story. In this blog, specifically, I write about something very dangerous. Denial.

Trust Your Gut is a series of stories about real people with weight issues, and complications arising from those issues. It will explain what the person is facing, what their options are, what they have decided to do to take action, and why they chose the path they are on. Each person’s story will be based on truth, so it won’t all be happy, but it will be real. The goal of this series is to get people talking about options that are available for people that have weight issues, on either end of the scale. If you would like to contribute to this series, there is a contact form linked on my Home page for this blog. I know there are people out there that want to help people like them, as I do.

The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name. If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story. The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors. I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.

Here is Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 83. 

In just about every online space you go, these days, at least in the platforms I use on a regular basis, people are talking a lot about mindset. The power of the mind is a miraculous thing when it is being used for a greater purpose. It can also lead people down the wrong path. I am not writing about the criminal mind, nor the mind of people who have mental health issues in this case, though. I am writing about how it can make you believe something that just isn’t true. In this case, I am writing about denial.

I love to read, especially fantasy and science fiction.

This love for reading has allowed me to expand my own creative horizons and write two books, with many other projects, and more to come, God willing. I love my imagination, and the way I can create worlds in my writing, with the hopes of fascinating readers with what I publish. When you read for pleasure, you also read to capture a bit of escapism from the real world.

I have been reading some books by Jim Butcher, who is the author of The Dresden Files. The main character, Harry, is a wizard for hire in these books, and I quite enjoy reading all of the trouble he gets into and manages to wiggle his way out of. It is a similar type of character that I have created more than once when I have been playing Dungeons and Dragons. Some of those characters have had fantastic adventures, the kind legends are born from. By doing the same thing as this wizard, in their own way.

Not too long ago, I was reading one of these books, called White Night. In this book, a character description made me pause and shake my head at what I heard myself thinking. The character was a mafia bodyguard, male, and he was described as massive, at over three hundred pounds. I thought to myself, “That’s not that big. I weigh over three hundred pounds.” It was at this moment I had to stop myself from reading, to process what I was thinking in response to that character description.

I then thought to myself, “Wait a minute. What did my brain just tell me?”

It was at this time I reread the paragraph and took a moment to process the amount of denial my brain has been feeding to me for the majority of my life. Three hundred pounds IS big. The distribution of the weight also plays a huge factor in this realization.

A person who is significantly taller than my five foot two and three-quarters of an inch in height would have the benefit of a larger area to distribute this much weight. Plus, it is a character described as a bodyguard, which would also have a different muscle to fat composition than I do. This character would be healthier, and not morbidly obese. Yet the weight of three hundred pounds is described as massive. I needed to proceed carefully as I processed this information.

I am still very mobile, even though lately I have had a hard time catching my breath. I can get up and down, walk and dance. I can sprint if there is a short distance to be covered and time to recover on the other side of that sprint. But I know that the distribution of my weight is all on the front side of my body, and it is more fat than muscle. And I got on the scale last week. I now weigh more than I did when I took that picture. It was really disappointing, but it is one reason why I am trying to do better.

I’m not going to make the mistake of thinking I am massive.

A part of last week’s story comes from the fact that people tell me I don’t look as big as I am, and that I carry the weight well. I am tired of not looking the way I feel. I do not see myself as massive, nor do I see myself as morbidly obese. When I look in the mirror, I just see myself. When I step on the scale, I see a number. Higher or lower than the last time, but nonetheless a number. This past week, it was 336.4 lbs. I am not in a hurry to get back on a scale after seeing this number, but when I do, I will share it for accountability. It is time to start dancing more every day.

On a positive note, I sang with the radio in the bathroom today to, “I want to dance with somebody” by Whitney Houston. I was done in the shower, and stayed in there to sing my heart out, and dance a little bit. When the song was over, I peeked around the corner at Roy and sang, “Don’t you want to dance, say you want to dance, don’t you want to dance?” His reply was, “Oh, I heard you singing.” He is not a fan of my singing, not at all. I said, “GOOD!” as I bopped down the hallway. We both laughed. I am doing better because I am trying harder. For now, that is what I am focusing on. Just doing as much as I can to be better.

When was the last time you had a reality check? #TrustYourGut

Trust Your Gut:Tish’s Story; Part 60

Trust Your Gut:Tish’s Story; Part 60

by | Sep 6, 2018 | Trust Your Gut

I was supposed to write this story last week, but time got away from me. I have a lot on the go, and sometimes I have to decide what to prioritize. I am going to try and catch you all up on what has been going on.

I have made some changes recently, in the hopes of improving my health.

I have all but eliminated pop from my beverage list. I will still allow it from time to time, but Roy started this a little while ago, and I am supporting him. Even though Zevia is on the plan. I will still have pop with pizza, and sometimes at home, but we have reduced our intake. He has lost some weight. I have had improvements in my blood sugars, with this and paying more attention to what I am eating and remembering to take my medicine. Little changes add up to big results. My 3-month average was starting to creep up to a bad number. It was 9.6;  6 months ago. The doctors want is under 7. I am happy to say that the latest bloodwork had it down to 8.8. Yes, it is not where we want it to be, but my doctor was so impressed that she said not to worry too much about that awfully high number you see in the cover pic. It was my weight not that long ago.

I was participating in a 10 day, 30 photo challenge online when I took it. The camera did add 2 pounds ( really, it did). I took to my Facebook wall and asked what colour should I choose ambiguously for the challenge that day. Hot pink or Legendary Red. Hot Pink won by a landslide. I painted my toenails in pink, dug up the feather boa, and stepped onto the scale for a pic. I knew it was really hard to do, and sharing it was brave. I was scared, but for me and my journey, I needed to share this pic.

It will soon be amongst the 29 + other pics I took over those 10 days in an album or graphic soon. I want to have them all together, to show others what I am capable of. Take note of that ending of the last sentence. to show others WHAT I AM CAPABLE OF! I am learning more about myself and what I can do every day!

My weight is a concern to me. It is the highest I have ever been to, and I know I need it to change. With that in mind, I decided to reach out to a Health Coach, who was recommended by my Diabetes Case manager. I had a few things to check out for our first appointment.

I have taken on the Wellness Wednesday Project (WWP) as the Ambassador. I am trying to help people at work with contests, prizes and information. My boss offered this as something I could do when I asked him if I could write a blog for our workplace. I was going to be at work early in the morning for a couple of months, and I thought writing would be something I could do at that time. I cannot access my book online to work on it, there is only wi-fi in the mall, not in the call centre I work at. I am not able to work on it there, unless it is old school, pen and paper, on my own time. When I am not working on WWP, I do take the paper copy of my book in and edit or write stories for the Kit Sora Flash Fiction with Engen Books. In the last one I entered, I placed second with my story. I placed third recently in another one. They are fun, and I am glad I can enter them.

Rabbit hole. Sorry, I get distracted sometimes.

There is a point, though. 😉

I was researching the Health Coach idea in light of my own need, asking about options for a friend, and checking on what might be available for work. There are workshops, and that may be something that happens in the future. For now, I have some information and I am working on my own goals with her. I am able to meet with her for appointments and we are working on my sleep habits, first. I am not able to change them yet, but I am conscious of what I am doing that delays bedtime on work nights, and I am trying to do better. We are now lowering the goal from 5 nights a week to 2 nights a week, to see if I can find ways to sleep longer. 5 or 6 hours a night is barely enough to be able to function. I am managing, but not feeling like my best when I am following this sleep-deprived schedule.

In talking with her at my appointments, we decided that sleep is important enough as a foundation for achieving my goals that it should be the right goal to start with. I need to put a little more importance in my health and sleep patterns to live a healthier lifestyle. It will trickle into other areas, and I will have the energy for things that I want to do but am too tired to do.

Something I realized is that I am putting a lot of things in the way of going to bed, and I need to treat myself to the same level of importance by getting enough sleep every night. I am working on it.

Even though the scale is not being nice to me right now, I am making progress in my blood sugars, which is very important for a diabetic. Once I start getting the right amount of sleep, the scale will be nicer. I just know it.

The other thing I have done was start a weight loss support group tied in with #Tishspiration. I am trying to hold myself accountable. I am working with a small group to help them and myself, to stay motivated. I am getting great feedback, which helps me to know I am on the right track. It is good to have a place where friends are in the same boat with you, or as I shared in a gif, all kittens in the same roller coaster ride. Since it is a small group and kept secret, the people in it feel safe sharing what is going on. I am finding their stories inspirational to me. It is a place to share our journey, and I do think it is going to help us all, in one way or another.

Like I wrote at the start, I am very busy these days. I am enjoying it as long as that is still a side effect, I will keep on keeping on!

#TrustYourGut #TYG

Week 2: What Should YOU do when Tishspiration happens?

Week 2: What Should YOU do when Tishspiration happens?

by | Sep 5, 2018 | #Tishspiration

#Tishspiration is the word I finally created to describe what has been going on in my life for the last two years or maybe even longer. I have been aware of it for the last two years, this I am sure of. I have been telling my husband for years that I am full of surprises. It went from being a saying to becoming what my superpower is. The best part of all of this is that I am using my powers for good. I am constantly surprising people around me with what I am doing. The best part is when I surprise myself. That is the true meaning of Tishspration, the part I want to share with the world. It can happen to you. I am going to try to explain it, and then give advice for what YOU should do when Tishspiration happens to you!

I have been on a journey for the last 2 years. It started when I watched that inspirational video, where I took away the message that I need to live while I am alive so that when I die and I think back on the life I lived, not filled with regrets and what ifs. I want to live life to the best of my ability. That includes trying things and doing my best. It means not dwelling on what might or might not happen, because I have done something to make a change. I am pushing my limits. I am trying new things. I am chasing my passions. I am surprising myself.

#Tishspiration.

Where do you start? Well, asking me is one way to find out more. Waiting for my book about Tishspiration is another option. It will be a few months from now before it is ready. What do you do in the meantime?

Think about what you want to do with your life. What is something that you are really good at, something that you get so involved with that before you know it, several hours have gone by. It should be something that comes really easy for you, even if you don’t think it is your passion. If it isn’t it might be a clue to where you are supposed to be going on your journey.

People are starting to pay attention to what I am up to. Some of them are curious. Some of them want to say they knew me before I started my journey, to be a cheering squad from the sidelines. There is nothing wrong with either of those reactions.

There is a small group of people that are watching me, and thinking about their own lives. They have seen me change and start to grow into the person I am now, and they wonder what if it happened to them? To me, the answer is simple. I would simply ask them, why not? Why not take one step in the direction you want to go in? Why not prepare yourself for what could be, instead of hating the way things are and doing nothing?

What is stopping you?

Fear.

Fear of failure.

Fear of not being accepted for being the unique and wonderful being that you are, from the inside out, the one you have buried inside for safe keeping.

Want to know a secret?

I am scared of failure too. When I try something and it falls flat, I let myself lay there for a while. In the melodrama of despair.

I cannot do that for very long, anymore. I have a drive in me, fueled by passion, bursting at the seams with stories to tell.

I am a Lyricist, with songs I cannot sing.

I am a Blogger, because I need to write.

I am an author, with some small published works, who is writing her first novel, and planning 5 more.

I need to let my stories out. If I keep them inside, they hurt me because I am selfishly not sharing the gift I was born with. By writing my books, I will be accomplishing my lifelong dream of becoming a published author. Surprising myself and others with how good I am at this writing thing. Most importantly, I will be sharing this gift with the world.

Because deep down inside, all of us know what our purpose is. We just have to be listening to our hearts whispering the answers to us. Then we need to make a plan and act upon it. One step at a time, on this journey of life. If you smother a spark, it will extinguish in time. Don’t smother your passion. Let it trickle out until you feel like opening the dam and letting it flow free.

Friends, I am standing in front of a lever, preparing to open the floodgates. The next step for me is getting my book published. I hope that you are 1% as excited as I am about it. I can assure you, I am the other 99% on the excitement scale, and then some! I cannot wait to be able to share this book with the world. I sincerely hope that you all will agree that it is worth the wait.

So what do you do if #Tishspiration strikes? Congratulate yourself on a job well done, then move on to the next goal. That is what I do, and I am an expert at #Tishspiration. It has gotten me this far…

#TishspirationTuesday Week 1 What is Tishspiration Tuesday?

#TishspirationTuesday Week 1 What is Tishspiration Tuesday?

by | Aug 22, 2018 | #Tishspiration

In an effort to get back on track with my blogging, I have decided to change up the Tuesday category. I love Treasure Seeker Tuesdays, and I am hoping that I was not alone in that sentiment. The time has come to try something new. #TishspirationTuesday Week 1 What is Tishspiration Tuesday? I might not even know yet.

I am going places.

I am going places.

Yes, I am writing my first book. Yes, I just took on a new project at work. Yes, I am planning a limited jewellery collection to be launched with my first (and every) book. Yes, draft 2 is in progress, in preparation for editing. Yes, I am all over social media, and I even got Instagram before I got a cell phone so that I can contribute there. I can follow I just can’t share there. Yes, I do talk to my husband when I am awake, and maybe in my sleep too.

No, I have not managed to hire a maid to keep up with the housekeeping. No, I have not hired a chef to keep me on track with my meal plans. No, I do not sleep very much when I am in a high creativity & productivity cycle. No, I haven’t been to Zumba regularly this summer. I will be changing that as soon as possible.

I drink my coffee black (which I review alternately with wine reviews on my Facebook live videos) and I take really good multivitamins. I try to eat healthily, and although I still have pop for a treat, I have basically given it up as an everyday beverage. I am making changes.

I ended the Birthday Bling Club. It did not get the number of subscribers I had hoped for. I have replaced it with a closed secret group to help people like me stay motivated and accountable with weight issues. It is going well. Now if only I could get back on track with my own weight loss goals…

What on Earth am I doing now?

I’ll bet some of you are wondering. There are days when even I am wondering…

I am shaking things up. I am using the momentum created by the positivity I have surrounded myself with to try and give you all a glimpse into the possibilities into what your own potential is.

That was a mouthful, wasn’t it?

Tishspiration. The Art of Surprising Yourself. Once upon a time, these two concepts were not linked. Until I thought about it. Someone I spoke with encouraged me to somehow find a way to meld these two things together. Now, it is as if they were never separate concepts. I made the term. I defined it. And now, I am going to run with it!

Tishspiration has been hovering around in my mind since April 2018, but it has had a much longer history than when I put a name to it. I will be writing a book to describe it in more detail. That will be book 2. I have to get book 1 written, published, and shared from my heart with the world before I can shift gears and get to work on book 2.  I can’t wait to explore what all of this means for me, and what it could mean for you.

As it grows and develops, there will be opportunities. Some will help me to fine tune this concept I have created into something that will change over time. I have been working on this in the background while doing all of the above. I have to keep going. You can witness all of it. I am hoping that when the time is right for you, you will take the leap with me. It all starts here. Now.

Are you with me?

tishspirationstation@gmail.com

Let’s start a conversation about this little thing I call #Tishspiration!

Salt Water Therapy

Salt Water Therapy

by | Aug 2, 2018 | Vacations

Salt Water Therapy is what is known to other people as beach time. It does involve the Atlantic Ocean and the coastline of Cape Breton Island, for me. This year, I was able to take a camera with me that I have on a long-term loan from a friend. I am grateful that I have been trusted to take care of the camera, and have been learning the craft of amateur photography since borrowing it. It is fun to take nice pictures. I can’t wait to share some with you all!

The featured photo at the top is of Margaree Island. I went out one afternoon to take pictures for the blog. It was the best of the bunch and my mom helped me decide which one to choose. I love taking pictures, but I do not always know which ones are the best, and which ones are not. I ask different people for help with different projects. This one was perfect for Mom.

We went back to Chez Edmond Vacation Home. I wrote about visiting my family there last year, and this year we all were able to stay in the same location. As much fun as it was last year to be staying with my friend, it was equally fun to be staying with my whole family under the same roof.

You can read about last year’s family vacation trip in a guest post on another blogger’s website. Homesick for the Home of my Heart was written to be shared on Mohamad Al Karbi’s blog specifically for his Around the World category. I encourage you to check out other stories and categories on his website, as there are many other authors who write as guest bloggers there. You can see more pictures from last year’s vacation that blog and also in the introduction blog post I wrote for my own blog, Sun Kissed and Salt Licked. Both posts were a little different and they both have stunning photography, contributed by myself, friends and family. I am blessed to have such a beautiful location to call my home.

We did enjoy wonderful weather all week long. I did venture into the host’s home to check out another business on the property. K Rugs LeBlanc creates her own custom designed,  unique traditional rag rugs. Located in the same driveway as the vacation home, it was a stop I was glad to have made. If you would like more information about the rugs or other art in the pictures of the next group, please send an email to giggleskleblanc@yahoo.ca

She uses the traditional rug hooking known in that part of Cape Breton. It is a French Acadian hobby. She also recycles t-shirts into her work. It was very interesting to talk to her and to see the project she was working on while we were there. She was using a picture to create the design. I hope to see the finished rug next year.

 

 

We did have some plans to go to The Dancing Goat. We made it a ladies day out, and also went to a gift shop after. The Dancing Goat Cafe & Bakery has a very good reputation for being an upscale cafe in Margaree, not far from Margaree Forks. I may not remember exactly what we all ate, but I did snap pics of everyone’s meal. There were 7 ladies there, and we all chose something different to eat!

Other food was prepared by different family members all week long. Here are a few of the highlights. I made the deviled eggs for a potluck barbeque birthday party. Same 3 people as last year, not as surprising for me to be included this year. My Dad and cousin share the same birthday, and mine is a few days earlier.  They tricked me into asking my Aunt to make the cake last year. I didn’t know that it would be for me too.

Most of us love lobster, and it is a real treat to have it cooked fresh. My dad and uncle set up a propane burner to cook them in a large pot outside at the farmhouse. If you go there for your vacation, you will not find this outdoor lobster cooking assembly. It was brought over by my uncle, who took it home after the lobsters were all cooked. As we have friends that share pics of their lobster all cooked and ready to eat, I wanted to take a picture to share of our fresh cooked lobster too. You will find this and the deviled eggs in the next slideshow.

I know. You are looking at these pictures, and reading my words, and wondering where the beauty of Cape Breton is. Wonder no more. I will share some pictures of some birds and flowers in the next group. It is a hint of what is to come. I am an amateur photographer, but having a really nice camera makes me feel like I know what I am doing! I love taking random pictures of things that I think are beautiful, or things other people might not think to take a picture of. With so many pictures to share, I thought it made sense to separate them into groups.

I spent a few hours at Chimney Corner Beach. With so many things planned within the week, it was the only day I was able to get to the beach and dip my feet in the ocean. Some of my nieces and nephews braved the chilly ocean waters, but it was not as warm as it had been the year before. I did not go in past my knees. It was literally bone-chilling, as the water had not had enough time to warm up for the swimming season yet. I decided to go for a walk with the camera. I made a video which has yet to be edited and subtitled for my YouTube channel, Tishspiration Station. I will get it worked on soon, but this blog post kind of took priority. Here are some pictures of my afternoon at the beach.

I was sitting on a towel, after my walk, when I heard people hollering for Daisy. When I finally turned to look, there was this lovely dog heading in my direction. She promptly laid herself down beside me and snuggled right up to my leg. I gave her a little attention before her family collected her. She was on a leash but made a beeline for me. Her owners apologized and explained that they think she is losing her hearing. Maybe it is selective. Unbeknownst to them, they were at a gift shop at the same time as me a few days later. She escaped from the family vehicle, and I heard the shouts for Daisy again, pleading with her to get in the car. The heat wave had not hit yet, at that point, and people don’t spend hours at the gift shops, so Daisy was not in any danger if she was waiting in the car for a few minutes.  This just confirms to me that it is definitely time for me to get a dog. Daisy seemed to like me, that’s for sure!

Finally, we have arrived at the space for the scenery of Cape Breton Island. I will not have to explain most of the pictures here, as they focus on the Cape Breton Coastline. There are a few other pictures mixed in here, but I feel that they are also worth sharing, a bit of the everyday mixed amongst the raw beauty. Enjoy. I enjoyed learning how to take better pictures, and I am really proud to share them with you all.

There you have it! I am really glad that I went. I am really happy for the memories we made on our family vacation. I hope that you enjoy the story, but even more, I hope you can see the beauty I tried to capture with my amateur photography skills. Someone with more training will likely see flaws and would edit or touch up some, I am sure. I have not taken any courses in photography, it is just another hobby which I love to do. Just like my writing and web page design; it is something else I am learning to do as I go. Since I am having fun, I hope that you can see this when you take a look at the results of my efforts.

Part 2 from the overnight visit to the other end of Nova Scotia will be ready soon. It will be a shorter story, but I felt it was worth a separate blog post of its own.

How is your summer going?