This past weekend, I wrote about facing my inner demons. I fight with myself sometimes. Nobody throws punches, and nobody gets hurt. Except maybe my own ego.
I can get stuck in a pattern of doing nothing while having the best intentions of getting through a whole list of things that need to be done. There are days when I literally talk myself out of getting anything done. It is a nasty little place to be in, and it happens when things are bothering me, or in the winter. I am less likely to have the energy to do more than the basics in the winter time, and that is sometimes left too long. In this endless loop of getting nothing done, I can become overwhelmed by how much there IS to do, and that doesn’t help me at all.
Spring is here. I feel the change in the weather, and in my spirit. The blog has started me off in the right direction. I am wanting to get things done, and I FEEL DIFFERENT about life right now. I am trying new things, making small changes, and thinking about what I need to do to make the leap from blogging to writing a book.
A year ago I was recovering from an infection in my knee. It was not a pleasant experience, I would never recommend a knee infection as something for anyone to do. I was away from work for 3 months, and sat around that whole time, as I was told to not be moving around very much. I had nurses visiting me in my home for IV antibiotics once a day for two or three weeks. I was taught how to bandage the wound when the IV was over, and they stopped the home checks. I longed for the day that I could have a shower without medical tape and shopping bags protecting the bandages from getting wet. I was on some strong painkillers, for the first time ever, and I was scared that I might become addicted. I did not.
Spring cleaning didn’t really happen last year. So I am on a mission to get it done properly this year. I am writing about it, and puttering at it, and making a little more progress in that kitchen every time I get in there. I have made a few inexpensive purchases to help me to get this project accomplished. I see the progress, but I am not ready to share it yet.
I needed to stop and just take a breath last weekend. That’s what the title means. When you worry about everyone or everything else and don’t take time for yourself, you can empty your coffee pot before you get yourself a refill. That is a mistake that can build into a disaster if it is not made a priority.
It’s not Ok to neglect your own needs in order to make sure that everyone else’s needs are taken care of first. Sometimes, it is necessary to take care of others first. However, if you don’t stop and take time for you, the coffee at the bottom of the pot is going to have a burnt taste, and it will not be a pleasant thing to drink.
Whatever it is in your life that allows you to feel refreshed and recharged is something that you need to always make time for. If it is the 5 am cup of coffee before anyone else in your home is awake, get up and pour yourself a hot cup of coffee. If it is taking a bath at the end of a long and tiring day, make time to fill the bathtub. Read a book for a chapter a day, at the time you can schedule it in. If you have dogs, they can help you take the time to yourself to think when you have to walk them anyway.
Or, at other times you need to be around other people. Friends and family are important too. Find people that are fun to be around, and bring you up, not down. I am not saying that you should ignore all of your other friends, but when you need to feel good, surround yourself with people, things and activities that help you do just that.
When I think about where I was a year ago, I had no idea I was going to make a leap into becoming a blogger. I was waiting to be told that I could start going back to Zumba classes. I was learning about the Trim Healthy Mama Plan, and trying new recipes. I was already going through the motions of being back to work at my day job. And I was miserable.
Now I have a blossoming new outlook for spring this year. I will be working on my New Year’s Resolutions and branching out with what I am doing with my life. I am chasing my dreams and making them into my reality. One at a time.
Thank you for reading my 60th Blog Post. Still having fun, and Always Thinking…
This picture really made me laugh. It will be the picture for my new Blogging series, called Weekend Warrior. I am working on cleaning and organizing my home so that when I am ready to dive into writing my books, I will not have to worry about what is not getting done or what should be getting done.
I just had breakfast. I like to sleep in on the weekends. This means if I am motivated and working on my house and chore list, it continues well after dark. I am a night owl, but find the weekday schedule really helps me to stay on track with my health. So I am a part of the rat race, Monday to Friday, 9 to 5, working woman. I do have a day job. The bills need to be paid. SO on a weekend when there are no plans outside of the house, I sleep in and go a little off schedule. I enjoy that. When we get a dog later this year, I hope it likes to sleep in on the weekends too. I realize that there will be necessary walks and wake ups with a dog to take them outside, but that doesn’t mean a nap won’t follow those little adventures.
I am breaking in my new coffee mug. It says, “Overthinkin’ and coffee drinkin’ ” it suits my life and my logo. It is a good size, and I purchased it last weekend on a whim. I saw it on facebook and had to have it. It is so “ME!” I will drink coffee from it while I write. It holds 16 oz of coffee, and that is a good start for my weekend coffee.
My new coffee mug. It says, Overthinkin’ and coffee drinkin’ on it. #WeekendWarrior
Plans for the weekend are developing, on the social side of things. Which means I have to make the most of the afternoon as I may be out this evening. Combining the things I don’t want to do with things I do want to do works out, somewhat. It can be counterproductive, too, though. If I am really on a roll, and getting things done on my list, then it is hard to find the motivation to keep going if I have to stop. Or sometimes I don’t start at all because I know I won’t be able to finish.
Sometimes I get a lot done, and sometimes I overthink the projects and that takes up all of my time. Music is a huge motivator for me. If the tunes are cranked, I find it hard to sit still. I like background music or TV when I am surfing the internet, or working on stationary projects, but to get me up and moving, the tunes have to be cranked.
Weekend Warrior. That is what I feel like when I am having a productive weekend. It doesn’t mean I am changing the world, or working on building or renovating anything. It does mean I am making progress on my lists, getting up and moving around, staying motivated, and having a little fun. Making the most of my free time, and getting that much closer to the goal of writing my books. Singing and dancing my way through the weekend is how I put on my game face. When I am Bouncing the House, I am getting the lists done, and that is exactly what weekends are for.
I made some resolutions at the start of this year. I am working at them, at my own pace. This week I feel like I am falling behind. We had a lot of snow early last week. I missed two days of work just digging out from under it. My husband, who normally does the shoveling, hurt his back, and is still recovering. So I did it myself. It was a lot of work, and the reason I missed the second day is because I spent more than 4 hours shoveling, and it exhausted me.
So I rested for 2 days, when I wasn’t shoveling. Eat; shovel; sleep; repeat; for 2 days. I didn’t get much done inside the house for those days. We managed. We averted the crisis of having no Pepsi in the house for my husband. It was a close one, though. He doesn’t enjoy coffee, he likes Pepsi. I enjoy coffee, and today, I am home without the car, so I can focus on what needs doing inside the house, and drink a lovely bucket of coffee.
I prep cook on the weekends. It is on my list of things to do. I need to get at the dishes and laundry. I want to finish the kitchen and move on to other rooms, but life happens. Other projects have popped up in the last month, so it was not a productive couple of weeks in my kitchen.
If you are following my blog, you are familiar with the Tish-ism in Bouncing the House. It is what I do. I crank the tunes and clean. This is in my plans for today. But where do I start? There is SO much to DO and only ONE DAY. I am a weekend warrior when it comes to cleaning, and someday, when I am more energetic or have things under control so that I only need a half hour a day in the week for maintenance house cleaning, that won’t be the case. I will be able to manage it this way at some point, and then I will have the time I need to focus on writing and crafts. What I WANT to do.
At the start of the year, I decided on three things as my resolutions. Work on me by living a healthier lifestyle, clean my house, really clean it, top to bottom, and write a book. I will not begin writing in earnest until the house is done. I will never get the cleaning done if I jump into writing and get lost in my creativity. I have a plan, but it takes dedication to stick to it and get it all done. One thing at a time, one project at a time, and one day at a time.
My creative mind travels in circles, and this can be distracting when I am working on something. I start loading the dishwasher, and go through the house to collect dishes. I find empty bottles and cans that also need to be relocated to the kitchen for rinsing and recycling. I fill the sink with really hot water, dish soap, and dishes that don’t go in the dishwasher. I wander into the bedroom and find laundry that needs doing. Get the laundry started. And realize that the dishwasher door is still open, the dishwasher is still not full and running, and the sink now has cold water with bubbles and dirty dishes in it.
So I add more hot water to the sink of dishes, and finish loading the dishwasher and take a break at my desk for a few minutes, only to realize that I lost track of time and the water in the sink, which was too hot when I sat down, is cold again and the dishwasher is finished and needs to be unloaded and the clothes in the washer need to be put into the dryer and a new load put into the washer but there is a load in the dryer that needs to be folded and put away. That was a long and busy sentence on purpose. It is demonstrating how I get in a loop.
Putting things away is a hard thing for me. I get so far with the cleaning and I just leave it for later which essentially is never and the clean clothes get piled up and the dishes are just used straight from the dishwasher so they pile up again as the dirty dishes can’t go into the dishwasher if there are clean dishes in there and you get the idea. I go in circles, constantly, if I let myself, and when I do this, the chances of me finishing anything are slim.
What do I do to fix it? Well, I am stubborn, and that means if I make myself do all the dishes, I can get them done. If I don’t start ten other things at the same time. Some of the chores in my list are the kind you start and have to walk away from, so I try to get them going first. That is also a trap. I need a break, and I lose three hours. I have no concept of time at all.
Turning the music up LOUD helps, as long as I don’t turn it down on a break. I can’t sit at my desk for too long if the music is loud. That is another tactic I use. It works if I don’t just grab the remote and turn the music down so I can spend more time at my desk procrastinating from the things I really should be doing.
Another thing I am going to implement today is a list. I find crossing things off of my list gives me a small sense of accomplishment, it means I finished that thing on my list. I make lists whenever I travel, and go over them several times to be certain that I don’t forget anything, and I cross items off as I pack. I don’t forget things when I have a list made. So I need to make more lists. This can take time and be distracting. I can put too many things down and never get back to the list, because I need to start a new one. Or I can just spend too much time making the list and get nothing else done. Not productive at all.
I think today I will be making more than one list. I also think I need to make lists more frequently until I get things back under control. After all, that is one of the goals here, to get things under control so I can let myself do the things I want to do. I will make two, on a small piece of paper. One for cooking and one for cleaning. If I just use both sides of a small piece of paper, I can flip it over, and not waste paper that way. If the list is small; maybe, just maybe, I can finish everything on it. And that would help to get me going in the right direction again, and help me get back on track. OK. Time to make my little lists and get my day going in the right direction! When I finish them, I have two writing projects that do need my attention. That will be my reward for getting the chores done, I can then work on some other projects that will make me feel good about working on them, not just to finish them, as I may or may not finish them by the end of the day. Getting time to work on them, though, will be a reward I can work toward. Progress is progress, and that is my ultimate goal for today.