Monday Musings | Compliments Should Not Be Confusing

Monday Musings | Compliments Should Not Be Confusing

I was waiting for an appointment a few weeks ago in a medical clinic. The appointment was with my occupational therapist, which I have been working with to overcome being overwhelmed so that I could tackle my to-do list. I have been doing very well, and I am finally able to say I am slowing down the frequency of the appointments so that I can apply what I have been learning.

While I was there, I saw a variety of people. A couple of parents, each with young children. An older lady who seemed to know her way around the place. The receptionists are familiar faces to me.

The older lady said in a very quiet voice, as she walked by a man and his young daughter, “Your dress is awfully pretty.”

I thought to myself, what a contradictory statement.

Why do we do that? The lady was obviously trying to pay the girl a compliment. How confusing it could be to someone who was not fluent in our language, though. Think about it. Awful is not a nice word, however, pretty is. I think it is time to drop the confusing adjectives. Really. Let’s get straight to the point, and skip the double-edged sword. The world is confusing enough as we all try to navigate through it, so let’s make it easier to pay a compliment.

Say What You Mean

Your dress is very pretty, says the same thing, with no double entendres. A double entendre is a phrase with two meanings, which is what I witnessed. Now a double entendre does have a time and place to be appropriate, usually when someone is delivering an insult in such a clever way that it leaves the recipient guessing. When done correctly, a double entendre certainly does have a place in the English language. If you want to shock someone or walk on the fine line between whether or not you are insulting someone, go ahead, be clever.

In conclusion, when you are complimenting someone, leave the negative words out of the sentence. It will feel more genuine, and likely reward you with a heartfelt smile. If you are trying to brighten someone’s day, please do. The world needs more positivity in every second of every minute of every day. Don’t throw clouds into an otherwise sunny moment in someone’s day. We can brighten their day with a simple compliment. This way, both people will benefit. Doesn’t it sound easy?

#MondayMusings

#Tishspiration Tuesday

#Tishspiration Tuesday

#Tishspiration is more than just a book for me

First of all, yes, I am writing a book called #Tishspiration: The Art of Surprising Yourself. It will be an inspirational book. You might think it is a book about my mid-life crisis if you only looked at the surface, but I know better. In contrast, it is a book about self-discovery, and how it has been happening my whole life, without me knowing what to call it. The last few years have been building me to this step, hence the mid-life crisis comment. I am preparing for one of the most important parts.

I recently participated in some free online challenges. From pushing myself in this way, I grow, and then I share my progress when I am challenged to. I have gone to the edge of signing up for a program and stopped. I am not ready. The coaches have challenged me to get ready for next year. They want to work with me, as I have kept coming back. I realized I am not ready because I have not finished exploring what #Tishspiration is. As much as I need the guidance on what to do next, I need to find out what this concept means, and what direction it wants me to go in first. This is not an excuse. It is me doing what I do. Making sure things are indeed as ready as they can be before moving on to the next step is the reason why I am holding off.

It’s not just about the money.

Sure, money is a huge factor in a decision like this. There is a lot more to the story. I am the type of person who has a good sense of when I am ready to take the next step, and most importantly when something is finished. I see it a lot in my day to day life. For example, making decisions on what to write, when to write, and finally, when to stop writing. Every story has an end. They also have a beginning, and if written correctly, an interesting middle which you can’t walk away from.

I am at the beginning of this part of my journey. The book is the interesting part which will reveal what is going to come next. That is my plan, although I could surprise myself with what does come next. It is something I have been known to do, take a step back and just revel in what I just created. It can be in the beginning, middle or end, and there is no set pattern for when I can experience it. The nature of this concept is that it can apply to everyone. I need to share it. The world needs my message. When I figure out exactly what it is.

In my own mind, I have already made it.

You already know I am working hard, waiting for the rest of you to catch up with me. I don’t write this to be conceited, or narcissistic. I am also working hard to remain humble. There will be bad days, and failures. They are inevitable. How I choose to move forward when these things happen is what is going to help me get to the next level.

I wrote a book. Me. I decided to just stop making excuses and get it done. It was hard work. It was incredibly frustrating at times. But that moment, the moment when I opened the proof copy online in front of the people watching my Facebook Live video, it was real.

It was real, unrehearsed and beautiful. I had to bail when my emotions were threatening to make me ugly cry on the internet. Nobody needs to see that. It was me, feeling all the feels, and experiencing what it was really like to have written an actual book. There are no words to truly capture what it feels like. To pour your heart and soul into what you can finally hold in your hands. The closest I can come is purely magical.

I can never have that moment again. Not from my first book. I long to feel it in relation to my current book. It will happen, and when it does, I expect a new magical moment to accompany it.

Everyone is a Critic

People are going to scoff at your dreams. They don’t know how long they have lived inside of you, or how brave you are to chase them. They wouldn’t know if they never tried. Negativity is not random, at least not in my experience. It exists, and plagues us all, in our lives. Jealousy is something that drives people to be mean. Don’t let the negative outweigh the positive. Fight to find your purpose, your passion and your pleasure. Stand firm in what you decide is right for you. Then show them how it is done.

Keep on dreaming, while taking action

A dreamer is a wonderful thing to be. I am a dreamer who comes up with the thoughts which propel me into action. I have thought up some wild plans in my life. They don’t all work. The point is to not let yourself get stuck in the thinking part. Thinking and planning are important, but executing the plan is imperative. If I was still thinking about writing my first book, I would never have completed it. Never had that magical moment when I held it in my hands. As a result of inaction, I would be in a horrible frame of mind, thinking that I was stuck in life the way it used to be, with no way to make it better.

In conclusion, what I am trying to explain here is that it is okay to dream and it is okay to think about different possibilities for yourself. However, it is imperative to take action. On what you decide is right for you. Not for everyone else, but for you. See what I mean about this #Tishspiration thing? It needs to be explored. I can’t wait to share what I find out with you all.

Why are you hesitating? What are you dreaming up to be your life’s purpose, passion and pleasure? Please let me know, I would love to help you figure out your next step. I can only do that if you tell me what is on your mind. I do love helping people, and maybe I can help you!

Treasure Seeker Tuesday #27 Beginning again

Treasure Seeker Tuesday #27 Beginning again

Hello Treasure Seekers! It’s Tuesday! Here I am starting fresh. It is like I am beginning again! I know it has been a while since I have been blogging, and my new schedule will have me writing in this category every two weeks, instead of every week. I really needed a break, and it is time to get back into the Blogging habit. It is a good thing for me to do, and I enjoy Blogging.

I am writing my first book. I have put aside the first draft to begin again, this time with a second draft. The first draft hasn’t been shredded, in fact, it will help me to perfect my second draft. Some of it is definitely worthy of making it into my book. Other parts need to be written with a new perspective, to have it in the correct point of view. I had to get a feel for where I am going with the stories and to do that, I needed time to think about what I did, and what I want to do.

One of my gifts is that I love to write, and tell stories. I have written song lyrics, and a poem or two. I have written a lot here on the Blog, and some people have told me that it is like a journal. In a way, it is. It is written from my heart, and that is where all of my stories come from. I used to write in journals, so maybe that is why it may read like a journal to some people. For me, it is not the same.

There is a lot more thought behind what I write here. My journals were written when I was a teenager and a young adult. They were a lot less polished, more raw than what I write here on the blog. Nevertheless, I treasure all of the words I write, like the hidden gems they are.  Some are kept hidden, from my past, and they will stay there. It is where they belong. The Blog is constantly being polished to shine. Every change I make is heading in the right direction for me. I am hoping that you are still going to be reading as I keep writing. That is another one of my treasures. You.

This afternoon, when I got home from work, I checked my Stats. I know the GDPR is coming up, and I am working on preparing my website for the change. I have seen very low activity in the past little bit. Imagine my surprise when I saw a jump in the numbers! It went from 3 or fewer views to 24! Weekend Warrior from this past weekend stirred up some views. That makes me smile, to know that people have been waiting for me to write more Blog stories.

Wow. For those of you that are with me on this adventure, thank you. Really. It means a lot to me when the numbers reflect that you are paying attention. I write for you to read because you matter to me. My stories mean something to you too. I hope that this pattern continues and that you will stick with it and with me. Oh my gosh, this just makes me smile!

So how can I help you to grow in your own way with me? It is something I have been thinking about when I was preparing for this story. I have started so many new projects in the last year and a half. I have tried new things and challenged myself. Sometimes, there have been things that didn’t work. I am too stubborn to just quit. I am just not that kind of a person. I may stop in my tracks to get my bearings, and then go full speed ahead in whatever direction I need to go next. How can you do this?

Trust Your Gut! Ha! If you read my Blog, that is another category, but the title lends itself here with a different purpose. Start with one thing. Something that scares you a little. Or challenges you. Go with it. If it doesn’t work, there are two possibilities. Either it isn’t your thing (which means you need to try something different next time) or you need to rethink what happened, and try it again from a different angle. That is it. It is okay to try things and decide that you don’t want to do them again. The important thing is to keep trying new things. Keep pushing for what you really want, even if you are scared, even if you don’t know what that thing you want is yet. Time is going to pass whether you watch it or become a part of it. I choose to participate, and what an adventure I have begun. I am on my way to things I never thought I would be able to do. I am, in fact, surprising myself. You have the power to do it too, if you decide to participate in your own life, instead of watching it pass you by. Do something new! Let me know what you did in the comments below. I can’t wait to help you discover new things about yourself. I want to know what works for you, and what doesn’t.

Need an example? #DanceWithJanet was something I tried this spring. I thought about it, planned it in my mind, practiced when I got my feet to join in on the project. It took some convincing. I KNEW I wanted to do it. I didn’t know how. I do Zumba. I like it. I make up the moves that work for me to get through the class. That is what I did in my blooper reel. I spent 2 days filming, one with a friend, and one on my own. I did it. This past weekend, Janet Jackson was on the Billboard Awards. She was getting the Icon Award, and she did sing a little. Loved it. The thing that made me want to jump up and down was the little dance section at just over 2 minutes into the performance. She did her dance to IF! That is the song I chose for my audition. I was blown away. I am still giggling and shaking my head. Grinning from ear to ear. She must have watched. She may not add me to her show, but I might have added a touch of Tishspiration to her life. I have convinced myself of this, and that it wasn’t just a coincidence. #Tishspiration. It is a word I made up, with a whole lot of potential. I am going to use it to move forward with my journey. I am playing with my creativity and imagination, and it is really surprising me.

There is one final thing of note for my #DanceWithJanet audition. I did it. I sent it in. No regrets. I was on Twitter after the Award show, and one tweet stood out to me. Someone wrote, “I should have tried out for #DanceWithJanet.” Someone else out there regrets not doing something that I actually did. I am not the person with regrets. That is something I can think back on and smile. Scream a little, jump up and down about, and clap my hands for. I DID IT!

I was wondering today if Janet Jackson has any idea how much she impacted my life just for allowing me to try? Not only have I felt the joy of actually doing something to change my life, but the responses I got from friends and family were nothing short of amazing. The support and comments from so many people really made it worthwhile. Okay, and so did the actual completion of the project, but the reactions on the internet really surprised me. Nothing but positivity. For this, I also want to thank Janet Jackson. I didn’t know how many people truly cared about me and what I am doing in my life. It makes me think that I am on the right path and that I must keep going. #Tishspiration is just beginning. Wait until you see what I am working on next! There is a hint at my Youtube channel, Tishspiration Station. By the way, if you didn’t see the Audition video, or the progress/blooper reel, you can find them there. It is where the word Tishspiration started, with that audition video, so it is fitting that they were my first two videos on my Youtube Channel. I am conceptualizing what to tackle next there. It won’t be anything with music or dancing at this time, due to copyright laws. I am still crossing my fingers that the videos I have posted there keep the music. It was a part of the audition, so it was not in any way meant to do anything but share my adventure. It was never intended to earn money or claim any rights to the music. It was her sone, for her open competition. I can’t just do that with any music I love. There are songs that allow usage on Youtube. I may have fun someday with other songs and dances. For now, I am working on my first Vlog on youtube. Stay tuned! Vlog #1 TBA. I am just getting started on this adventure! I hope you will join me because I am glad that you are here!

#TreasureSeekerTuesday

 

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