Trust Your Gut, Tish’s Story; Part 44

Trust Your Gut, Tish’s Story; Part 44

 

Trust Your Gut is a series of stories about real people with weight issues, and complications arising from those issues.  It will explain what the person is facing, what their options are, what they have decided to do to take action, and why they chose the path they are on.  Each person’s story will be based on truth, so it won’t all be happy, but it will be real.  The goal of this series is to get people talking about options that are available for people who have weight issues, on either end of the scale.  If you would like to contribute to this series, there is a contact form linked on my Homepage for this blog.  I know there are people out there that want to help people like them; as I do.

 

The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name.  If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story.  The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors.  I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.

This week I am pleased to share another of my own stories.

Here is  Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 44

I have been doing okay with my food choices this week. Not perfect, but okay. I indulged in some chocolates and now they are gone. I bought chocolate ice cream, and haven’t gotten into it yet. When I did buy it, I looked really hard at the larger sized bucket, as it was less than a $2 cost difference between the one I ended up buying, and the larger one. I am fine with treats as long as they aren’t around all of the time. If they are, I make them disappear…and reappear in places like my chin! I want to learn to stop making the magic of this type from happening. It is a time for a new magic trick. And that different kind of chocolate that I have been craving.  Diamonds, darling, I am setting my sights on chocolate diamonds.

I have mentioned this to my husband but I don’t know how seriously he took my comments. I am aiming for a time about six months from now. I am going to set a goal, and if I make it by my birthday, I am going to get a reward that I can happily show off to the world. What better incentive can I make? Well, I will be needing to add to my collection once I get it started. I would rather collect diamonds than pounds, so it is a great thing to work for.

I haven’t set the goal yet. I want to be realistic. So let’s do the math. Ugh. 6 months. The average healthy weight loss goals have always been 2 pounds a week. 6 months have 4 weeks each. Multiply that by 2 pounds a week and you get 48. I am going to round it up to 50. So the goal I am setting for myself is realistic. I am undergoing a change in my day job starting next week, and I will be missing my Zumba for a while. In the winter, but I have a plan. As I am ALWAYS THINKING…

I have decided that I am going to workout at home. I know a few of the Zumba moves by heart for some of the songs.  I have a step here too, for exercise so I can mix it up. I may even start a third day of exercise a week. I want to say more than 3 days a week, but I am not going to push myself so hard that I just give up. That is not the way I want to approach this change in my schedule. I want to do what I can, on my own, and then when I do get back to Zumba, I will not be so far out of shape that I have to build myself up to where I am now in my fitness level. See, ALWAYS THINKING…

In the spring, I still want a dog. If it isn’t a chocolate lab, that is OK. I will love any dog we take home. A dog means I will have to take it for walks. Walks are good for me, but I do not want to go just because of me. If I have a dog, I will need to go, because the dog will be needing this to happen. More than once a day. I live in a trailer court, and it is well kept. It is a nice place to live, and lots of people have dogs here. I would have a regular route to walk a dog on twice a day, and I think that is a fantastic goal to work towards. I know, I have written about these things before, but I am still aiming for them.

What are your goals for living a healthier lifestyule in 2018?

#TrustYourGut

Treasure Seeker Tuesday #10

Treasure Seeker Tuesday #10

Double Digits. Do you remember when you turned 10 years old? I remember that it seemed like a big deal at the time. I had lived through my first decade. I never had any real big parties for my birthday, it was in the summer, and I lived outside of town. I remember the day I found out in grade one that my phone number was long distance and nobody wanted my phone number to call me.  That broke my little six year old heart. I didn’t understand what it even meant at the time, except that none of my new friends wanted to call me because of my phone number.

I am still feeling a bit out of the loop in the modern world. My household budget does not have room in it for a cell phone. I don’t NEED it to survive, I am getting along just fine without it. However, I work in the industry, and it is hard to not want to be connected in the land of text messaging as it happens, literally all around me every day.

I don’t want just a cell phone when I finally get the go-ahead from my hubby to get one. He manages our household budget, and I am eagerly awaiting the day when I can make plans for purchasing things like the next pet we bring home, 2 cell phones, attending an event that I really want to go to, my next bottle of wine, and a second car. For now, we make ends meet, and we work hard to get what we can within our budget.

One of the most important features for me when I finally do get a cell phone will be to get one with a really good camera. I use Pixabay and Canva as resources in most of my blog pictures. The picture above was actually taken by me with my Olympus 2.8 x Optical Zoom 5.0 Megapixel camera. I try to get good quality pictures with it, but sometimes they are a little out of focus because I am not a photographer. I will need a camera that is so advanced that it makes me appear to be a good photographer so that I can feel more confident about sharing my own pictures here and on my website. I am still working on that project in the midst of everything else, and I have a lot of the planning done in my head, just not executed on the internet. It will happen. I am going to plan a launch for it, and I hope that all of my current followers here will follow me and the blog to my website.

The other thing a cell phone is going to need for me to consider purchasing it is an ease of transferring the pictures for storage on my computer. I need the phone and computer to be able to work together. As I have a PC, I am guessing I may have to go with an android phone. I do know that there are many opinions out there about cell phones, and I would love to find out more information on which ones have the best cameras, work well for listening to music, and are easy to get to talk to my computer. It also needs to be reliable and wants to be easy to use. I have not yet owned a smartphone, and I am impatiently waiting for the day that I get to share my digits with my friends and family.  It would be useful for blogging in my spare time, too, or checking out how the blog looks on a smaller screen.

With the recent change in Canadian Laws regarding unlocking cell phones, I am less restricted by what phone I can get, as I can use it with any Canadian carrier, including the company I work for; if I decide to go with that company. I am not as concerned with what provider I choose as I am about the camera. So I pose the question here: What cell phone would you be getting if this was your decision, with these requirements in mind? I know there are some people out there that are fiercely brand loyal, and that is OK, but if you only buy one type of phone, it may be harder for you to be objective in answering this question.

Double digits. Phone numbers. Megapixels. Optical Zoom. It all goes back to numbers. Which I am not all that crazy about. I am passionate about writing, and in the Blogging world, a good quality picture can mean the difference between someone choosing to stop and read your article or not. Blogging is something I am still fairly new at, but I know it is something that I enjoy. I will keep working with the tools I have until I can purchase something better. So, I ask you, Treasure Seekers, what would you be spending your gold on if you were in my shoes?

#TreasureSeekerTuesday

 

Trust Your Gut, Tish’s Story; Part 44

Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 39

 

Trust Your Gut is a series of stories about real people with weight issues, and complications arising from those issues.  It will explain what the person is facing, what their options are, what they have decided to do to take action, and why they chose the path they are on.  Each person’s story will be based on truth, so it won’t all be happy, but it will be real.  The goal of this series is to get people talking about options that are available for people who have weight issues, on either end of the scale.  If you would like to contribute to this series, there is a contact form linked on my Homepage for this blog.  I know there are people out there that want to help people like them; as I do.

 

The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name.  If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story.  The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors.  I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.

This week I am pleased to share another of my own stories.

Here is  Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 39

Balance. I was trying to decide what my topic was going to be about this week, and it came to me. I need to write about balance. It is a word that has a lot of meaning and plays an important role in my journey to become a healthier version of myself.

 

I will start with Zumba. It is a dance exercise class. I am not the most athletic person. I really love dancing, though. Almost as much as I love swimming. I like biking and skating also. I have not done the latter two for years. I was swimming in the ocean in July. I went to Zumba class twice this week. So I am most active in Zumba class. I go. I do my thing.

I had Wednesday off for a vacation day this week. I then went to Zumba class, and it was an amazing class for me. I felt free and had no weight on my shoulders from spending the day at work. What a nice change it was.  I danced and moved around with a little more zest last night at class. During the stretch, I always amaze myself with my balance. If I take a few extra seconds to set up for my “tall” stretch, I can stand on my tippy toes and reach high up and hold it longer than I used to. It takes those few extra seconds to set it up, but I can be comfortable in the stretch when I do. If I don’t, I wobble. I have yet to fall over at Zumba (it is not a goal, it is a fear) and I have to catch my balance there sometimes. I can trip over my own feet in a split second, and then recover in the next second. I have mad skills at this. Once in a while, gravity wins. The result of that usually leaves me in shock, because I am such a clutz, I normally have an equally remarkable recovery skill.

Balance.  The Trim Healthy Mama (THM) plan, also involves balance. I am still having commitment issues, but that is not what I am referring to. The plan encourages a way of pairing the foods that you eat to maximize weight loss by using protein as the foundation and pairing it either with low carbs, or healthy fats. The way you plan your meals on THM creates the balance for you. It evens out if you find the way your body responds to the different types of food combinations. When I focus, I can see it working. I need to work harder, but also find the balance for real world situations.

Balance. The time spent and meal planning will be the balance for the healthier version of me. I need to make the time to plan and prep cook. Then when I need something quick, it is an easy fix. That is a no-brainer.

Balance. Sleep and exercise. I need to find more time to sleep and exercise. I have been so busy at different times this year. I know that sleep and exercise are important. Especially if I am going to work my way into writing full time. I know I function better if I have regular sleeping hours. I just get wrapped up in things when I am working on the website, the blog, or my books. It also slips away from me when I am working on other hobbies.  Working on my passions is a source of great happiness for me, but I have to remember that other things matter as well.

Balance.  I love coffee. I love pop. I love alcoholic beverages. I do not love water.  When I do drink, I choose everything before water. I need to balance that a little better.

Balance. I need to find it. In my blood sugars, food, health, exercise, sleep, hydration, passion, creativity, and every other aspect of my life.

What are you doing to achieve balance in your life?

#TrustYourGut

 

Trust Your Gut, Tish’s Story; Part 44

Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 36

 

Trust Your Gut is a series of stories about real people with weight issues, and complications arising from those issues.  It will explain what the person is facing, what their options are, what they have decided to do to take action, and why they chose the path they are on.  Each person’s story will be based on truth, so it won’t all be happy, but it will be real.  The goal of this series is to get people talking about options that are available for people who have weight issues, on either end of the scale.  If you would like to contribute to this series, there is a contact form linked on my Homepage for this blog.  I know there are people out there that want to help people like them; as I do.

 

The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name.  If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story.  The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors.  I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.

This week I am pleased to share another of my own stories.

Here is  Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 36

Well, I have good news, and bad news this week.  I went to the Doctor. Not because I was sick, but rather because it was time for a checkup.  I met my new doctor. Finally.  If first impressions are worth anything, I knew in the first minute I found myself a good one.  She seemed meticulous and genuinely wanted to get an idea of my plans in relation to my overall health before my checkup.  I needed to find a doctor that I could trust, again. My last doctor was good, but I think this one is going to be great.

The bad news is that I got weighed.  I am not at the all-time high from before, but I certainly am not in as good a shape as I have been in the past.  I am not following the plan, and I am visibly showing that to the world.

What is wrong with me? Why do I eat things that are bad for me? Why can’t I just lose weight and eat whatever I want to eat, like skinny people do?

I have health issues.  I have reasons, and I know that realistically, it didn’t add up overnight, so it will not be removed overnight, either.  I know in my mind that junk food is bad for me, and healthy food can taste good. But sometimes I pick the lazy way. Other times I self-sabotage. There are times when I just create excuses and choose to believe them, even though I know they are lies.  Chocolate and the monster have been prominent in the last few months.

I don’t know how long I am going to be in this slump. I do know that the number on the scale made me take notice.  It is a real number, one I can’t pretend isn’t an issue anymore by refusing to weigh myself. Avoidance is not a valid option when it comes to Diabetes.  I know that. I am having difficulties in other parts of my life, and something is holding me back from being the best version of myself.

Sometimes, you have to hit rock bottom before you can climb out of a slump and rise up to your next level.  Whatever I am going through in my personal life, I can’t eat it away.  I have to face it and deal with it. Head on.

That is not an easy thing to do. It is not an easy thing to think about, let alone to write about, to share with people. But it is going to help me break free and move forward.

Change is hard. I have been pushing my limits with my writing and my blog while keeping a day job and running on coffee.  I have been out of the multivitamins for a few months, now, and I plan to buy some again asap. They do help.

I got the doctor to change one of my prescriptions.  One of the side effects of the other medication was drowsiness, and I was having a hard time with it.  I know that I am a night owl, but I used to be OK with keeping up with my current schedule. I am starting to not do as well as before.

Maybe that was me tapping into the mystical energy people talk about having when they lose weight.  I have gone in the wrong direction on the scale, again, and that is definitely a factor. Being heavier means it is harder to do everything because you weigh more. It doesn’t mean I am going to stop and give up.

I need to do some soul searching, and find a reason to get things back on track.  I know I felt better, had more energy, and was happier.  But if things are not Ok on the inside, and I am spending some of the precious energy I do have in keeping up the appearance of being happy for the world to see, then I need to get to the root of the problem, so I can find a solution.

It isn’t easy, but it is necessary to propel me into my next level. The fear of wondering how bad my weight has become is not holding anything over my head anymore. I know what it is, and I know how it happened.  Now I have to find out why, so I can take the next step to working on my goals.  I have to keep telling myself that I am worth the effort, that I matter, and that it is important to make my health a priority.  It won’t be easy, but nothing worth doing ever is.  Time to deep dive into my issues and make some changes.

#TrustYourGut

Trust Your Gut, Tish’s Story; Part 44

Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 31

 

Trust Your Gut is a series of stories about real people with weight issues, and complications arising from those issues.  It will explain what the person is facing, what their options are, what they have decided to do to take action, and why they chose the path they are on.  Each person’s story will be based on truth, so it won’t all be happy, but it will be real.  The goal of this series is to get people talking about options that are available for people who have weight issues, on either end of the scale.  If you would like to contribute to this series, there is a contact form linked on my Homepage for this blog.  I know there are people out there that want to help people like them; as I do.

 

The names here may or may not reflect the person’s real name.  If someone wants to remain unknown, we will choose a different name for that person’s story.  The goal is to help people, and anonymity is a valid personal choice for contributors.  I will use a person’s name only if they give permission to do so.

This week I am pleased to share another of my own stories.

Here is  Trust Your Gut: Tish’s Story; Part 31

Another week has come and gone.  Thursday was yesterday.  I am a little sorry that I am writing late this week, but my heart wasn’t in it yesterday, and I want to keep it real and honest with you all. I have suffered a loss nine days ago that has affected me more than I expected in some ways, and just as much as I thought it would in others.  This loss was neither on a scale nor of inches.

There are two certainties in life.  You are born, and you die.  A dear friend of mine lost her battle with cancer nine days ago.  I plan to speak at her Celebration of Life Ceremony tomorrow.  While I was writing what I wanted to say and organizing my thoughts for that, I realized that it was more important for me to focus my attention on it when I decided to do it.  I got a friend to give it a read through in an editorial sense, but because I drafted and edited it myself, she thought that it was a great piece of writing.  So I am sorry if I let anyone down that is following my journey in this category, but all is not lost.  I am here today, and I feel like writing.  If the family is OK with me sharing my story after I read it tomorrow, you can expect to read a different kind of Weekend Warrior story later on this weekend.

So what brought me around, other than the guilt of missing my self-imposed deadline for the weekly story?  I was watching another video along the lines of Branding, and learning more about how to be effective at it.  Wait, what?  How does this relate to a struggle with weight issues?

The guest speaker was talking about taking what makes you mad, and writing about it.  Not an infuriating anger filled frustrated rant, but to use common sense thought processes and provide a solution.  This is the basis of what I want to do here.  I am mad that I am the way I am, physically, and health-wise.  I write about what I need to do, and I learn new recipes and ways to improve my health and change what I am using for fuel in my body to have a positive outcome.  I can write about it, I can think about it, I can talk about it, but the bottom line is, only I can care enough about myself to actually DO something about it.

I seem to be at opposing sides with my food choices.  I will eat a really healthy meal, and then go WAY off track and have junk food or fast food.  Willpower is certainly lacking in my life these days.  I am struggling with some old monsters.  They are ganging up on my inner light and causing me strife.

The feeling that I am never going to be good enough is a main contributing factor in why I weigh over 300 lbs.  I get it from many sources in my life.  My childhood was not bad, not at all, but sometimes the messages were not presented in a way to make me flourish.  I don’t believe people when they compliment me right away.  I need to hear things that are positive about a million times before I believe them, and then I get upset.  I just don’t know how to accept compliments.  I am working on this and getting better about thanking people when they say nice things.  For me, this is a real struggle.

Work is another area where this arises.  Workplace Bullying is wrong, no matter how subtle it is, or who the bully is.  I am not singling out my current employers, let’s be clear about that.  But when I see or experience it, it makes me feel like I am not good enough.  I struggle with that internally, and it is not always somebody else’s fault.  Sometimes I can be too sensitive.  I am learning to stand up for myself, and this is not easy for me to do, either.  As I learn, I have to make mistakes.  Picking battles is a trickier thing than you think it is.  If I was to cry out about every little thing that happened in my life, people would stop listening, stop reading, and stop caring.  Then I would be alone and back to doubting myself.

Sometimes the monsters are on the outside.   That is something that makes me angry.  People that abuse power are the worst kind of bullies, and I come from a long history of being a victim.  I struggle every day to be a good person.  It tears me up inside when that is perceived to be not good enough.  At this point, I can react in two different ways.  I can hide, and cry until I have no more tears.  Or I can speak out.  I am doing more talking, and it does not always go as well as I plan it in my head.  Some things are not OK, and some things need to be confronted.  When things backfire, I do hide for a bit, until I deal with my feelings of being hurt.  Sometimes I can be overzealous in my attempts to stand up for myself.  In these cases, I do get upset, but these days I stand to face the music, instead of turning tail and running.

Still not sure how I am planning to tie this all together?  Well, the ugly monsters inside are the worst ones of all.  The inner bully that kicks you when you are down and sucker punches you when you weren’t looking is pure evil.  We all have the negative self-talk, the hard feelings about one thing or another that we let win.  I have been doing a little too much of that this month.  I am letting the monster win, and that is not going to end well.  I have two choices.  I can do nothing, or I can do something about it.  I think it is time to take action and kick some monster butts.  I feel the inner glow getting a little brighter as I wrote that.  I needed to get it out.  So I am going to take my common sense and use it to change what makes me angry.  For this category, that means I am going to start making better choices and be the change I want to see in myself.  One thing at a time, one choice at a time, one story at a time.

Trust Your Gut.

 

 

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